We have just finished six months of research looking at the extent of nerves and anxiety surrounding weddings. Over the next few articles in this series (Wedding Nerves) I will be looking at wedding nerves, treat healing what causes them and giving you some tips to help.
In this first short articles I will look at the nerves Brides get. The most obvious candidate for nerves, viagra sales anxiety and even panic attacks during the run up to and during the wedding is the bride-to-be. In our survey of 299 brides-to-be we found the following:
- 71% of brides-to-be suffered from nerves of some description on the run up to the wedding.
- 92% of brides felt some form of nerves on the day of the wedding or the evening before.
- 66% of brides-to-be reported that the nerves got so bad that it affected their daily lives before the wedding or affected their performance and / or enjoyment during the wedding.
- 19% of brides-to-be reported that they had one or more panic attacks before or during the wedding. (See this article for a description of panic attacks).
- 8% stated they were confident and happy at all times before and during the wedding.
So what were they nervous about?
We were a little shocked at the extent and breadth of the issues that the Brides said triggered their nerves. This is a summary of some of the more frequent responses:
- Have I made the right decision?
- Am I good enough?
- Will it work?
- Will he cancel the engagement?
- Will I find out something about him I don't like?
- Is he who he says he is?
- Will I go through with it?
- Can I cope with his mother / father / family / friends?
- Can he cope with my mother / father / family / friends?
- Will my mother / father / family / friends behave at the wedding?
- Will his mother / father / family / friends behave at the wedding?
- Will the wedding be a disaster?
- Will I make a mistake at the ceremony?
- Will I do something daft on the day and people will laugh at me?
- Will one of his ex girlfriends turn up / object at the ceremony?
- Will one of my ex-boyfriends turn up / object at the ceremony?
- Will the cake be OK?
- Will the centrepiece be perfect?
- Will the flowers turn up and be everything I want them to be?
- Will the decorations be fantastic?
- Will the food and drink be excellent for people?
- Will I remember what I am supposed to say / do?
- Will I trip over in the aisle?
- Will my hair be perfect / stay perfect?
- Will the make-up be just right / stay right?
- Will I freeze or throw up from nerves?
- Will the day go well without any disasters?
However the number one reason given for brides wedding nerves was this:
I don't know why I am so nervous.
As you can see the extent of the triggers of nerves and anxieties for the brides is somewhat extensive, and this isn't an exhaustive list by any means. These are the most frequent responses we got during the research.
This all had a number of consequences for the brides:
"I wish I could just run off with Ralph and get married in Vagas or somewhere on our own."
"This is really affecting my life. I am a bag of nerves."
"I can't sleep"
"I can't concentrate on anything at the moment"
"It is more a mixture of excitement and fear"
"I feel sick at the thought of the wedding. It shouldn't be like this."
"I can't wait for it to be over"
"I am nervous but that's fine. I think it's more excitement than fear."
"I am terrified of freezing on they day"
"I am happy, very, it's just the nerves. I just want to run away."
"This is the scaryest thing I have every done"
"This is total fear. I am not sure I can go through with it."
"I am anxious but I am really looking forward to it."
"I can't eat."
As you can see from the range of consequences, most are affected to some degree. For some the outcomes were considered to be quite serious and were certainly affecting their enjoyment of the anticipation of their wedding day.
I'll look at the figures for the grooms' nerves in the next article.
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